Reviews.

This has a lot of potential so far! Shannon is a lively character, and I like the humour in the dialogue (the giant carnivorous cows conjure images that are pure Gary Larson).

"That'd have to be one tall carnivorous dying cow."

Best line I've ever come across.

I'll admit, I was EXTREMELY wary about The Village section of this after seeing what happened to the Signs section (Mary-Sues invading the world so they can all marry Uncle Merril), but you're one of the very few writers who can pull off an original character and make her funny, witty, and not stereotypical.

Keep up the good work.

I love the bit about the dying cow, and that bit:
"El, I'm telling you now, I don't want to hear the words 'noise' and 'woods' coming out of your mouth."
"Okay, I heard sounds coming from the forest that didn't sound like squirrels."

This is such a good story, i admire the fact that you went through the other story and decided, hug i don't like it or the way it's going, and decided to restart it and that's really cool...i think i was reading your other story...i can't remeber anyway, i'm reading this now so that's all that matters, right? *crickets* Right?
~*Just stop*~

Very nice! ;)
I have a problem with writing one shots because they always want to seem to evolve into these huge monster stories, so I marvel that you got this up, lol. You don't really see many one-shots around these days...
Anywho, it was great. Good writing, good style, and I'll definately be reading it if you decide to make it into a larger story.
Cheers!

--Cayenne Pepper Powder

I really liked this story! Cant wait to read more of your writing. This character is very funny, not to mention a lot like me, but i really think you should do more with her, it is a great beginning of a story ^_-

That was absolutely wonderful, I couldn't have done it better myself. You rock, girl, keep it up. The last line... wow. It was great.

"A desperate kiss, for a desperate moment, on a desperate day, in a desperate year, during desperate times. You and Jack’s relationship fit in perfectly in these times – desperate."

I love it. *standing ovation*
Always,
Heaven Marquin, The Bonnie Pirate Lass

That was a really cute story! It wasn't weird and the plot is fine. See what happens when we authors are in a weird mood, we write a good story! Great job!
~DAP

This is really good so far! You are keeping the characters in, well, character very well! I can't wait for more! Update soon!

Amanda

I'm intrigued... great first chappie, everyone was IC and your style was very nice. I can't wait for more!

~ Verona

wow...this..is..wow..

I liked it alot...i think that at first it was confusing whether or not Annalise was the victim but once that was figured out i was good to go...you write really well with this one, i won't say better than your others but it's pulled me in quite quick...Write more soon!

~Christina

Okay, I'm just gonna say that the last line in Desperate isn't my favorite and feels like a run-on. Anyway, if you'd like to add to my growing collection of reviews, which I'd much appreciate or have questions, email me at angelchic296@hotmail.com. Also, my stories can be found at www.fanfiction.net/~nicole297 or www.fanfiction.net/~colie. Don't ask why I have two, it's a long story.


				*I Would Have Succeeded Too...* *Reviews.*



	Home \| Me. \| Find Me. \| Pictures. \| Reviews. \| Fanfiction. \| Original Work.


		Review.



		Fanfiction to read: Opportunemoment.net : All I have to say on that, my lovelies. Go read! *Also, The Trouble With Women by Cayenne Pepper Powder* at ff.net. Reviews: Memories Past, Futures Forgotten:** This has a lot of potential so far! Shannon is a lively character, and I like the humour in the dialogue (the giant carnivorous cows conjure images that are pure Gary Larson). *** "That'd have to be one tall carnivorous dying cow." Best line I've ever come across. I'll admit, I was EXTREMELY wary about The Village section of this after seeing what happened to the Signs section (Mary-Sues invading the world so they can all marry Uncle Merril), but you're one of the very few writers who can pull off an original character and make her funny, witty, and not stereotypical. Keep up the good work. *** Yeah! Fellow Kevin fangirl! :D I love the bit about the dying cow, and that bit: "El, I'm telling you now, I don't want to hear the words 'noise' and 'woods' coming out of your mouth." "Okay, I heard sounds coming from the forest that didn't sound like squirrels." Yeah! Please continue! * A New Pirate in the Caribbean:** This is such a good story, i admire the fact that you went through the other story and decided, hug i don't like it or the way it's going, and decided to restart it and that's really cool...i think i was reading your other story...i can't remeber anyway, i'm reading this now so that's all that matters, right? crickets Right? ~Just stop~ * Inculcated Gaucheries: Very nice! ;) I have a problem with writing one shots because they always want to seem to evolve into these huge monster stories, so I marvel that you got this up, lol. You don't really see many one-shots around these days... Anywho, it was great. Good writing, good style, and I'll definately be reading it if you decide to make it into a larger story. Cheers! --Cayenne Pepper Powder * I really liked this story! Cant wait to read more of your writing. This character is very funny, not to mention a lot like me, but i really think you should do more with her, it is a great beginning of a story ^_- * Desperate:** That was absolutely wonderful, I couldn't have done it better myself. You rock, girl, keep it up. The last line... wow. It was great. "A desperate kiss, for a desperate moment, on a desperate day, in a desperate year, during desperate times. You and Jack’s relationship fit in perfectly in these times – desperate." I love it. standing ovation Always, Heaven Marquin, The Bonnie Pirate Lass * That was a really cute story! It wasn't weird and the plot is fine. See what happens when we authors are in a weird mood, we write a good story! Great job! ~DAP * Child's Tale: This is really good so far! You are keeping the characters in, well, character very well! I can't wait for more! Update soon! Amanda * I'm intrigued... great first chappie, everyone was IC and your style was very nice. I can't wait for more! ~ Verona * this is so bloody damn good. hurry up and write the next chapter *** wow...this..is..wow.. I liked it alot...i think that at first it was confusing whether or not Annalise was the victim but once that was figured out i was good to go...you write really well with this one, i won't say better than your others but it's pulled me in quite quick...Write more soon! ~Christina --- Okay, I'm just gonna say that the last line in Desperate isn't my favorite and feels like a run-on. Anyway, if you'd like to add to my growing collection of reviews, which I'd much appreciate or have questions, email me at angelchic296@hotmail.com. Also, my stories can be found at www.fanfiction.net/~nicole297 or www.fanfiction.net/~colie. Don't ask why I have two, it's a long story.